Metamorphosis!

This morning, as each morning I read a quote from Seth Godin”

Butterfly hunting:

“Ideas are like that. The successful editor, curator or entrepreneur doesn’t go hunting ideas to kill them, but to celebrate them, identify them and dance with them.”

Reading Seth’s quotes invigorate me; I started to write a long awaited article about Metaphorical journeys.

Metamorphosis, from caterpillar to butterfly! It takes instinctual allowance over courage for the butterfly. For a human, a force from the internal depths start the grueling process, consciously. In tandem, courage and persistence take hold each decision made through immense self-restraint.

Over the last several years, beginning in 2018 through 2020, my own Metamorphosis entered, captured and thrusted me into my future, unknowingly. Finally beginning to feel the exuberance I once was, accompanied with a deeper development of self. All these moments culminated after a horrific injury – followed by another injury and a quarter of my life decimated. I faced my internal horror alone, as many do, some injuries are an enigma of life, others will never find peace in the self evolution.

Now cognizant, LIFE has progressed, Metamorphosis claimed my entire being.

Am I free? Free to be obsessed in sharing what I have learned, yet tis only a raindrop in the reality of life.

When any of us approach this phase in life, the pressure in the depths of our being takes over. We must harness the intensity, for there is an unknown bumpy road ahead, a warrior must stand up and face our own life and the imminent changes ahead, without knowing if we will succeed. Often not knowing the beginning or end vision of what an outcome might be, the stance is, life must change and move on.

Ironically, 2020 and covid offered up a time of rest, reorient while a larger portion of my creativity blossomed; writing and publishing my first book, and continuing with the next few books accompanied by articles regarding our human condition gone awry.

This is more than a leap of faith – rather an obsessive churning fire that cannot be extinguished, demanding of the internal self, change must be consummated.

Metamorphosis, from caterpillar to butterfly! A natural yet grueling process when done consciously.

The list need not be repeated – our fights are more poignant to every individual, change is the brink of life’s edge, and choice will determine our fate.

The 4 books I was writing went down the tube without a second thought.

A good friend stated, “this work was valuable to others.” I stated it is becoming a long horrid memory for me – I want my freedom!!

Done deal – as I walked away as a teenager from extreme violence! I want my freedom once again!

He accepted my reasons and stated “your instincts are your innate wisdom!”

Allowing the rain showers of change wash over long standing violent trauma, acquiescing to the transformation, often without a cogent guide, only instincts.

The beauty of metamorphosis corrected my decisions!

As I conceded to my friends’ wisdom and knowing my freedom would not come unless I embraced the yoke of life.

A life of violence and trauma. Most all recovery on my own, as I studied and forge different life highways. These times are more important for the public to understand and hear from stalwart individuals who do not come out unscathed.

Dedication and fortitude must be embraced for sanity’s sake!

I had many reasons to keep going, after-all I figure out the recovery process from transient amnesia, TBIs and PSTD, while getting fit after 4 major joint surgeries and 2 more joint surgeries to come. Each time regaining my body, strength to ride my Arabian horse and train my new Rottweiler for service work.

This work is Not for everyone! Many do not have the interior and exterior to come out of the unscathed position of life, and to face more life’s hardships. Finalizing and letting go of any lingering hostility or self persecution. Allowing the pivotal point of freedom, Self-Metamorphosis. For most of us, the voracious life experiences leaves unspeakable actions – victimizing the innocent from internal despondency.

First, having to admit I was miserable working as a therapist in Trauma Recovery, with my life being recently traumatized via injuries – additionally, a violent childhood, all became pivotal moments.

What do I want? My answer “Joy! and how does this translate? Freedom to enjoy my horse, dog, cat, art, Rocky Mountains – venturing out exploring different towns, talking to strangers about their lives, and writing the impassable is possible.

I had started a book on Rottweiler behavior and stories, time to revisit. The simpleness of acceptance made sense.

CHANGE! in itself is natural, we forget the daily change we experience, from day to year and over decades.

Metamorphosis: willingness to find and live our internal selves: dreams and happiness follows.

The wonders of all Butterflies evolving through its own Metamorphosis; the brilliance of nature. And we humans are part of this infinite nature.